Thursday, June 15, 2006

Funniest President Ever?

Photo snagged from CrazyNews.net

"And one reason I went to Iraq yesterday, no matter how secretive the trip was, was to get a firsthand feel for how those people are thinking over there, what are they like?"

No matter how secretive? What? Which people thinking what? The troops? The Iraqi’s? He's so wacky!

"I understand leadership. Leadership requires determination. You've got to be determined to do something in order to be able to lead, particularly in difficult circumstances."

So you’ve got to be determined to lead in order to lead which means doing something? Like leading lemmings over a cliff? You can't tell me rodents commiting suicide isn't funny!

"You've got to have will. You've got to have desire to succeed. You've got to have a plan. And that's what I found in Iraq."

Found a plan! Observational humour! Like Seinfeld. Brilliant!

"It's really important that the Iraqi people have no doubt in their mind that we will help this government succeed. It's important for them to understand that."

C’mon people, how many times do I have to say it? Stop staring out of that shell hole in what’s left of the wall, stop fidgeting with your shrapnel wounds put the IED away and pay attention! Bueller? Bueller? Hi-larious!

"And I know there's going to be different voices, and there should be different voices out of America."

Because different voices tells us who the traitors are! And then they can be deported to Gitmo! Topical! Looo-ving it!

"That's where we're great. That's what makes us interesting… "

We are sooo interesting, and wer'e great at it! Hip sarcasm. I'm plotzing

"...and great; people can say whatever they want to say, as they try to attract votes. But my voice, what you hear from me, no matter what these polls and all the business look like, is that it's worth it, it is necessary, and we will succeed."

WE! Oh stop, stop, you're killing me! You're killing!!!

Oh! Wait a sec...that's not ....funny.

12 comments:

thepoetryman said...

Yes. we will succeed at destroying a faceless enemy! O! George! Keep the one-liners coming! You are bound to have a tour set after you leave office! All the comedy clubs in the world will be clamoring to have you come do your routine!

"Whooooo Hoooooo! Git in line!"

dusty said...

My favorite part of that friggin speech was when the Asshat-in-chief said"look em in the eye" and then the nimrod paused and did it..

betmo said...

i like to think that i am interesting so boy am i glad i got the props from the validator in chief. too bad he doesn't back up his words with action. if he had any respect for a duly elected iraqi government, he would treat them as equals- not underlings.

5th Estate said...

dusty... I think he thinks he's Reagan, not realising he doesn't have Reagan's "acting" skills.

betmo...you are indeed interesting; but not so interesting that your opinion or vote (or mine) might be counted as in any way relevant to Bush, nor the opinions of the troops who want to go home nor the Iraqi's who want them to leave.

And we still have two more years of "The Madness of King George"!

DoctorBoogaloo said...

Kee-rist, what an asshole that man is. His 'press conference' looked like a low-budget 'Last Comic Standing'. He is foul, obscene, uneducated... and a fucking coward.

But on a brighter note: England is on top of their group. I thought Sven should have started Rooney in the 2nd half. Why wait? And Crouch... man, I was thinking to substitute him and keep Owen on the field. (I was worried that Peter was already on one yellow card and with the frustration setting in.... Well, I'm just glad Sven didn't take my phone call.)

Nice to talk to another football fanatic... especially one who's cheering on the bastards from over 'ome.

I love Lampard. This kid is going to bust some serious ass against Sweden. (Doctor Boogaloo predicts Frank scores 2 against Sweden.)

The World Cup. Drama, baby. And you really have to give Trinidad & Tobago credit. (I mean, there are more people in my house than in that entire nation... they were brilliant.) And speaking of T & T: Jeez, when Dwight got blasted in the jewels, I swear I felt it. (I hated Yorke @ Man United. Because he was always putting balls in the back of Arsenal's net.. he and Andy Cole.)

Okay, I'm on a roll. I loved the pictures in the tunnel before the game. Dwight Yorke and David Beckham... two captains talking as though it was Man United v Southampton.

Hey, I'm loaded. But football is the greatest team sport in the world. WHY DOESN'T NORTH AMERICA UNDERSTAND THIS?

Red Tory said...

What was it Jon Stewart said…? Something like “Going to the Green Zone and saying you’ve been to Iraq is like going the Olive Garden and saying you’ve been to Italy.”

guerrillasinthemidst said...

But was he not the superior drinking-buddy over Kerry?

KEvron said...

chimpo's "a" material kills every time....

KEvron

thepoetryman said...

Kevronius,
"chimpo's "a" material kills every time...."

Smack! :>)

Carl said...

TPM,

The password is....BAM!!!!! with garlic.

Truth-Pain said...

THAT was funny,.. nice way to wake up from my Friday night malaise...

thepoetryman said...

Thespis,
You say Bam I say Smacklet's call the whole thing garlic!